Terrible Twos and Corner Woes

Preston has hit the terrible twos. Don't get me wrong-he is really a great little kid, but he has his moments. And when he has his moments-whoa boy! He has a couple of traits that I completely despise:

1) Swatting at people;

2) Throwing objects or clearing off a table with one powerful achon arm.

The former I know where he picked it up, the latter, I have no idea. The swatting was started by my brother Charlie. When Preston was about ten months and touching faces, Charlie would pretend to fall on the floor when Preston touched his face. This made Preston's day (look he was 10 months-that and pureed bananas did it for him) and he started to swat harder. What did not penetrate was that not everyone was going to play the "Swat Game." But certain people would indulge him (*cough* Mom, Dad, Katie, Steve, Chris ) and now he truly believed that random strangers would enjoy a slap in the face as opposed to him just being a cute toddler.

Now his swatting has taken on another dimension. Part of it is self defense. Part is defending his momma. Preston is not too fond of people invading his space (Think Seinfeld's "close talker"). If someone gets into that private bubble, they are getting a swat. If someone comes to close to me he feels the need to protect. I mean he went at a pizza delivery guy who was coming out of the elevator the other day. The guy was not even delivering to us! This can prove to be very uncool if mommy is trying to snag a single, rich, neurosurgeon (*cough McDreamy), so this naturally has to be curbed. At school he is taught "Nice touches." Partly because all of the children are mini Ninjas and partly because you have to teach that nice stuff so they don't go out and slaughter small defenseless forest animals. And he likes giving nice touches. It's almost like he just wants to make sure that this person is not a "bad guy." So in a way I am glad he is more aware and not willing to walk away with any scary man carrying a 3 Musketeers, but I still don't want him to be that jaded at 2 thinking everyone is a potential threat and constantly ready to go all Chuck Norris on them.

His swatting is mostly still a game. He is 2, a boy and sometimes wants to get wild. He usually does it to people with a big smile on his face. He also thinks getting wild is a game. I usually immediately tell him nice touches and he will give nice touches. I know they are thinking I am raising the next Damian. They usually understand....until Preston's head spins 360 degrees.

The other problem is the throwing. The throwing is never sincere. It's not in self defense. It's just plain wrong. This I never excuse and want it to stop! I never tell Preston he is "bad." My mom never used that word to us. For his self esteem I don't tell him he is "bad." I might tell him something is not nice or something is bad, but I never say, "You're bad." The throwing is his way of showing frustration. I kind of understand him, he has my level of patience (which is a low threshold). For example, if he cannot get his Crocs on after two tries, the Crocs go flying across the room. If he asks for more Cheerios in his empty bowl and I say "no," that apparently equates to chucking the bowl off the table. If we have to leave for school and he is playing with his farm, where do you think the pigs and cows go?

I cannot tolerate the throwing. After he throws, he bends his head down and breathes through his nose like a dragon. I have tried to think of how to discipline in this situation. I tried my couch, but he sits on the couch for stories. I did not want to use his crib or his armchair because those are happy places. So I opted for the good old fashioned corner. My mother used this on my youngest brother Chris. Chris was a royal pain and threw tantrum after tantrum...really not much different than him at 24...

The corner was effective. He stood for all of 10 seconds, would turn around, hug me and go about the day. Then he realized I was going to keep putting him in the corner when he did something wrong. So we went to Ba and Papa's house this weekend and Preston emptied my mother's basket of cocktail napkins in the family room and brought it into the kitchen. He then threw the basket on the floor after I asked him to pick up the napkins. So I put him in the corner. He stood there. For a long time. After like a minute I told him if he picked up the basket he would not go back in the corner. What did he do? Walked over to the basket and hurled it across the kitchen. I said to him, "Now get back into the corner." And he did! And he ran there with a big smile on his face....laughing! And stood there again-this time for about three minutes.


You know what Preston accomplished? He turned it around on me. Now when you ask him if he'd like to go in the corner, he says, "YES!" Now what? He has turned punishment into a game. I can try taking TV away in the morning, but all that will accomplish is him hanging off me and me being unable to blow dry my hair. I am sure if I keep putting him there the novelty of this new game will dissipate. For now though, I have been outsmarted by my own child. So here is Preston in the corner. All that is missing is a raised finger to mommy. Oh well. Any suggestions warmly accepted!